Holy Moly, Me Oh My
Last night I had this stupid idea that I was superhuman, and sat up watching The Real Housewives of Orange County (I know...) way past my bedtime, thinking that I could bound out from beneath the covers after just five hours of sleep and rock a workout like some kind of alien.
That did not happen.
I woke up at 6:40 a.m. for a 7 a.m. workout, stumbled into the bathroom, picked up whatever was clean-ish from the floor, slapped on workout clothes and grabbed a cup of ice water. I was ready to go, leaving the kitchen, when I remembered the feeling of utter nausea and helplessness that followed the last time I didn't eat anything before CrossFit. With literally zero time to make anything, I grabbed a piece of wheat bread (not toast, bread) and ate it in my car on the way to the gym. Throwing the crusts to the birds because nobody likes wheat bread crusts.
When I got to the Box, everybody just launched into the warm up. I didn't die, but I maybe should have stayed in bed.
This is what we did:
10 hanging twists
15 push press
15 squat jumps
15 ball slams
50m bear crawl
1 minute row (no arms)
1 minute row (no legs)
1 minute row
500m row for time
2 minute max distance farmer's carry (I made it 235m with 32lbs - a 16lb kettlebell in each hand. For perspective, the guy next to me carried 32lbs in each hand. Yeah.)
Max rep ring dips in 2 minutes (I had to do tricep dips - 21 total)
Max rep wallballs in 2 minutes (almost smacked myself in the head with a 10lb ball)
I took a picture of my shoes and was going to make a joke about how my legs were shaking from the intense workout we did today, and you couldn't tell because it was a still photo, but honestly it's my arms that are jelly. And you can't tell that either, because the intense effort it takes me to push down the keys to tell you about how hard it is to push down the keys doesn't show at all in how you read this written word. And now I've ruined the joke.
Do me a favor and pretend it's funny for next time.